About Me

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South Africa
My husband, Brett and I live in beautiful South Africa and have been blessed with the most precious family. We have 2 very beautiful and brave daughters, Tianna (15) and Angelee (12) and a very precious little boy called Zac who touched our hearts forever in his 1 day here on earth. We never would have imagined that we would have to live this side of Heaven without our sweet boy who was born with half a heart, but every day Jesus carries us through and is teaching us more than ever how to live, laugh and love fully. 3 years ago our faithful Great Restorer graciously blessed us once again with another son ... our beloved Gabriel ... a ray of sunshine in all our lives! "Love in Action" is our journey as a family to love the way Jesus is teaching us to love and live.

Blog Archive

30 September 2011

The Day of Promise has Arrived

Precious friends ... The big day has finally arrived! Come 4pm today we will be taken into theater to meet our precious miracle son! Our hearts are filled with the Promises of our Beloved Jesus. This post is our hearts response of praise and adoration to Him because He has faithfully carried us through each day with "heart peace", strength, hope, faith and incredible love. He has coached us in how to stand leaning into His Almighty power, wisdom and goodness and has taken all the fear out of this journey. Today our hearts are soooooo excited. It is the day of promise ... Zac's appointed day to shine forth His Glory. As a family we want to thank each and every person and family who has lavished their love, encouragement and prayers to stand with us in looking to Jesus, the Great Physician in knitting Zac's inward parts intricately and wholly in my womb. We will keep you posted as we rejoice in great expectation at witnessing God's amazing love in action! Our eyes are fixed on Him! All our love, Brett, Janine, Tianna and Angelee 

27 September 2011

Looking to the Rock who is Higher than I

As always, I need to start my post with a word of thanks for all the amazing words of encouragement and prayers that have been sent to us. I am not always able to reply to each of you personally, but please know that Brett and I pray God's blessings on each of you and praise Him with all our hearts for the amazing body of Christ who has rallied around us from all parts of the world! We are so humbled and blessed!!!
Every step of the way God has showed us clearly as a family how He has gone before us. Before every appointment we have faced over the last 8 weeks, He has always given us His promises to anchor us before we hear anything negative of fearful. Even in our trip to Cape Town He has provided for us in so many amazing ways. For the first part of our stay before we have our precious baby boy, here is the view from our bedroom and lounge ...
Such beautiful waterways and the back of Table Mountain. Though you cannot see it in this picture, when I look out to the right we see the sea too. It is so peaceful. I feel so cocooned in the shelter of His wings even though the storm has raged around us. The closer we get to Zac's caesar date (next week Wednesday), we have noticed the enemy try to thunder about us like a roaring lion. God in His amazing love and grace has shown us that while he may roar really loudly, the fact remains that he is a defeated foe! Jesus Himself took care of that personally through the finished work of the cross. As we look to Him ... our peace and certainty remains anchored. 
In the week before we left for Cape Town I sensed the Lord ask me if we were willing to "walk on the water" - so to speak - with Him. Thank goodness we have the Word to look to in cases like this, because I have learned from Peter that as long as I keep my eyes fixed on His eyes, miracles are happening all around me. It is only if I turn to look at the size of the waves that my heart may feel overwhelmed. Isn't He amazing that He can give us peace in the midst of any wild storm?! Only He can!
These last 4 days for me have been a real test of whether I would stare into His eyes or look to the size of the waves. We met our new gynecologist, who is a very compassionate man, but also has to do his job professionally. As it was our first meeting, it was his first opportunity to scan Zac's heart for himself. After the scan he sat us down and spoke very frankly of Zac's chances. In short ... he felt that he had to prepare us for the fact that he cannot see how they can possible fix what he sees on that scan. He talked us through the delivery and what we could expect. He was trying to prepare us to say goodbye to our son. Oh Jesus ... it was the hardest appointment for me! Only He could hold Brett and my heart together. It was painful to hear that medical science does not feel equipped to fix what they see. HOWEVER, God had already gone before us once again with promises from the previous day and the revealed miracle of a recreated aortic arch and this reminded us that He IS at work!!!
We did our book in yesterday at the Christian Barnard Memorial Hospital. I found it tough. I just wanted to run a mile!!! Everything within me wanted to run back to the "safe place" back home of familiarity. This walk is a radical walk of faith. I got into the car and cried. As I cried, I felt His immense comfort to say it is all right. You are allowed to cry and be in faith at the same time ;0) How brave we sometimes try to be ... but it is not bravery He is looking for ... it is the leaning of all that we are into all that He is. He is looking for us to completely allow HIM to carry us in every way! This settled my heart once again. He is a God of certainty. Just before we left for the hospital He led me to read Hebrews 6:15-20. Verses 15 & 18 say 
"And so it was that he (Abraham) having waited long and endured patiently, realized and obtained (in the birth of Isaac as a pledge of what was to come) what God had promised him. 
This was so that, by two unchangeable things (His promise and His oath) in which it is impossible for God ever to prove false or deceive us, we who have fled (to Him) for refuge might have mighty indwelling strength and strong encouragement to grasp and hold fast the hope appointed for us and set before us."
Even as I type this my spirit is strengthened as I see how specific God is when He guides us through storms. When we first heard the actual "heart diagnosis" by the specialist 6 weeks ago and I asked God how we were to stand, I asked Him if He was asking me to lay Zac down. Clearly the Spirit of the Lord told me in the following days that He has not called us to lay Zac down, but that He is asking us to have the same faith that He asked of Abraham. To believe in Him and His goodness. Abraham knew that however God chose to do it ... He WOULD PROVIDE and that he was going to go back down that mountain with his son! He even told that to his servants who waited for them, before he and Isaac went up that mountain.
When God gives us His specific word on a matter, we have to see it as a certainty. That is what God is teaching Brett and I in our journey. He has been so specific with the promises He has given to us throughout our personal journey. Even though we have not yet seen the complete heart miracle, God has promised it to us. Hebrews 11:23 is a great encouragement to us as we stand believing ...
"So let us seize and hold fast and retain without wavering the hope we cherish and confess and our acknowledgment of it, for He who promised is reliable (sure) and faithful to His word." 
As I woke up this morning, and looked out my window at Table Mountain He once again guided me to read the following verse:
"From the end of the earth will I cry to You, when my heart is overwhelmed & fainting;
lead me to the Rock that is higher than I (yes, a Rock that is too high for me).
For You have been a shelter & a refuge for me, a strong tower against the adversary.
I will dwell in Your tabernacle forever; 
let me find refuge & trust in the shelter of Your wings.
Selah (pause, & calmly think of that)!
Psalm 61:2-4 (Amplified Bible)
My precious Jesus ... You alone are the Rock that is higher than I and it is with You that nothing is impossible. You are my certainty and my sure foundation. You alone are the One who daily gives to us "heart peace".  I will worship You. 
All my love,
Janine xoxox 

23 September 2011

We are Seeing the Miracles Unfold!

Precious friends and family ... we are starting to see the miracles unfold! We just KNOW that we are living in the miracle :0) Yesterday we had a scan with the specialist who discovered and diagnosed all of Zac's heart defects in August. It's been about 6 weeks since the day we heard the horrible news. As you may remember, the defects she discovered that day in "that" heart were so complex ... not only one defect, but multiple! There was the issue of only 1 chamber; only seeing one major valve from the heart to the lungs where there must be 2 and then the complication of not being able to clearly see the arch of the aorta. What she saw of it, as well as  several other specialists, it looked too narrow and underdeveloped from what we could understand. When we came back from that first scan and spoke with our friend and paediatrician ... this was one of his biggest concerns. The aortic arch is so important in the functioning of the heart! 

So before we went for the scan, I started reading over my promises in the Word of God concerning Zac's covenant promises. This has been our lifeline and anchor ... God's report versus  mans report alone. I needed to prepare my heart for what we would hear. I was working through what my expectations should be as we are waiting on the Lord for the miracle to be evidenced. Do I go in there expecting to see it all unfolded, or do I still have to wait till the day of his birth? All along I have had this sense that it will be fully evidenced on the day of his birth ... but is it scriptural for God to hide or conceal it until the time He decides? These are just some of the things we have been seeking His leading on. So I open my Bible and start reading Isaiah 49 and here I find these promises from the Lord:

"v 1. Listen to me, o isles and coast-lands, and hearken, you peoples from afar.
The Lord has called me from the womb; from the body of my mother He has named my name.
v 2. And He has made my mouth like a sharp sword;
in the shadow of His hand has He hid me and made me a polished arrow;
in the His quiver has He kept me close and concealed me.
v 3. And the Lord said to me, You are my servant ... in whom I will be glorified.
v 8. Thus says the Lord, In an acceptable and favourable time I have heard and answered you,
and in a day of salvation I have helped you;
and I will preserve you and give you for a covenant to the people ... 
v 16. Behold, I have indelibly imprinted (tattooed a picture of you) on the palm of each of My hands;
your walls are ever before me.
v 23... and you shall know (with an acquaintance and understanding based on and grounded in personal experience) that I am the Lord; for they shall not be put to shame who wait for, look for, and expect Me."

This completely settled our hearts to know that no matter what we would or would not see on the scan, we have seen with the eye of faith Zac's miracle because we have God's Word on the matter! Our son is hidden in His hand, being formed and polished for His purposes and on the appointed day they will all see the Mighty Salvation of the Lord in his precious heart being whole! We just KNOW that God has already established His covenant with Zac.

So into the room we walked with peace in our hearts. The specialist was blown away that I have made it to almost the end of my 36th week and still no signs of distress or premature labour! People ... this is a MIGHTY MIRACLE! Our doctors had told us that we could expect him to come anywhere from my 32nd week and that I would probably never make it past 33 or 35 weeks (when both my girls came). Well, Mr. Zac is super cozy in the hands of Jesus cocooning my womb. We then started the scan. Yip ... she still sees the 1 chamber ... yip ... she still sees only 1 valve instead of 2 ... but hang on ... whats that ... A PERFECTLY FORMED AND FUNCTIONING AORTIC ARCH!!!!! This is such a huge miracle! Those defects are simply disappearing and will have to continue to do so until the day of his birth! hee hee!!!  How lovely is our Mighty Jesus!!!! Oh my goodness ... He is always mighty to save to the UTTERMOST!

The specialist still is emphatic to have us understand that this is a highly complex defect case, in fact they cannot even label it with a diagnosis as it is beyond their known labels, but we KNOW that Jesus doesn't need a diagnosis to be able to heal ;0)  Our precious Zac's heart is being made whole in His Almighty Hands. Thankfully these are Hands we know and trust with all our hearts!

So friends ... celebrate with us just another miracle along the way! God delights in each of the prayers and love you have poured out upon our lives and oh how we love and appreciate each of you too! We are praying His Almighty blessings over your lives today.

Lots of love from a super excited Robinson family!
YAY JESUS!!!!!!!!!!!! 

21 September 2011

Bathed in Love

Today was the big drive to Cape Town. As I woke up and switched my phone on, my phone started beeping with message after message. This continued throughout the whole drive and even now as I get ready to go to bed ... an absolute outpouring of love and encouragement. Brett and I have never experienced so much love and support from the body of Christ like we are right now in our lives! People around the world, many we know and even more that we have never had the privilege of meeting are carrying us in prayer and standing with us in faith as we await in faith the miracle of Zac's birth. To all of you who have written to us, phoned us, messaged us and walked alongside of us ... thank you! Through your love we see Jesus so clearly. He has raised up a mighty army to walk with us and celebrate with us as we get ready to receive our miracle boy. 
We have seen God go before us every step of this faith walk. Today was just another example of that. Where fear would have loved to have crept in, God ushered His perfect love in to keep us encouraged every minute of this day as we drove to Cape Town. (Adeye ... thank you for being an instrument in His hands to rally the troops to pray us through today. We were so touched by your blog post! How I love you my friend. The amount of messages have taken our breath away). Last night a precious couple came and washed my feet and prayed over us as a family in preparation for all that lies ahead. That same precious woman has prayed, fasted and constantly cheered us on in God. Friends and family have called and popped over all of this week to pray over us, drop off food, lavish precious gifts and offer all kinds of practical help. Even our accommodation while we stay here in Cape Town has been Divinely set up and we are so blessed with His mighty peace and provision as we come away to rest as we await Zac's birth. Our daughters are seeing what "love in action" looks like as they watch all the goings on. Jesus is truly carrying us!  
We await more doctors appointments this week. In it all I hear His gentle whisper tonight ... "Be still and know that I am God". What a lovely Jesus He is ... so gentle, gracious, lavish in love and oh so Mighty to save to the uttermost. We go to sleep with hearts bolstered in encouragement and expectation. 
Thank you to all who have shown us "love in action" in ways we will never forget! 
All our love,
Brett, Janine, Tianna, Angelee and Zac

20 September 2011

Reasons to Celebrate

I am quickly typing this in between trying to pack up for Cape, and while packing I am having this to celebrate :0)

What to celebrate you may ask ... well you would be amazed at how many amazing blessings you will discover of how good God has been to you when you start looking back and remembering what He has walked you through. Today I am celebrating many wonderful things! I am celebrating how no matter how dark certain moments have appeared to be, His light has ALWAYS broken through!!! Hope & Love have ALWAYS overcome the deepest of fears.  I am celebrating the precious family He has surrounded Brett and I with and the amazing friends and loved ones who have cheered us on and been praying us through. I celebrate how He has cocooned both my daughters hearts with the same peace He has cocooned Brett and my heart with and sheltered our precious family in constant hope of abundant life! I celebrate that as an extended family He has faithfully taught us all how to walk in victory and peace. I am also celebrating today that I am 36 weeks pregnant - way further than the doctors ever dreamed I would go and Brett and I are dancing with joy that the doctor today estimated Zac's weight as finally being in the 2kg range!!! He is about 2.1kgs!!! This is such a wonderful answer to prayer. Just look at our precious son. Isn't he a miracle already! How much joy he has brought to us already, even before we have had the opportunity yet to hold him. Look at those lips! They are just waiting to be kissed by mommy and daddy! 
Today I really want to bolster each of your hearts that as you start to remember all the many ways God has been faithful to you, that faith would rise up inside of you, so strong and true, that you would see Jesus' heart of love for you! This is the same God who is looking for any opportunity to show you His love and faithfulness. Find a reason to celebrate today!!! You are treasured beyond words!
All my love,
Janine xxx 

16 September 2011

Getting Ready for Cape Town ... Are we Prepared?

Hello friends. Thank you SO MUCH for your wonderful comments and encouragement to us as a family. We have been carried by God's amazing peace every step of these last few weeks and are so blessed to have so many people praying and believing with us. 
As we head towards our 36th week of pregnancy, we are getting ready to go to Cape Town in preparation for our precious Zac's birth. We drive on Wednesday with our girls and then go for all the scans, meet the doctors & specialists and hopefully get a rundown of the hospital where Zac will be born.
Brett and I can sense that we are in the last stretch of the pregnancy now and these last few weeks are a time of leaning into Jesus. There is so much we cannot control. There is so much we cannot predict. The journey to Cape Town feels like Jesus asking us to walk on the water. When my mind begins to contemplate the size of the waves, my heart reminds me of the certainty of the One on whom our eyes are fixed upon. Walking on water was a breeze for Him, so if that is what He asks of us, certainly it isn't as impossible as it would seem ;0)
The closer we get to Zac coming, the more we are asked if we are "prepared" for all scenarios, whether good or bad. I understand the heart behind this question, but I'm not always certain on how to answer. Here is my attempt to express our hearts as the time draws closer.
If it is a question of whether we are prepared for the worst case scenario, then our answer is how does anyone ever prepare themselves for defeat when cultivating a heart of faith in the certainty of God's overcoming work on the cross for our son. No. We have not prepared ourselves to grieve. I don't think anyone can prepare to grieve until you are in that situation. If it is a question of whether we are prepared for the possibility of surgery, then we can firmly answer that we have placed ourselves in the wisest place to have Zac's birth - in Cape Town where an exceptional team of Doctors and Surgeons have been preparing themselves in the event that they can possibly do anything to help Zac. I have been monitored closely ever since the diagnosis. First and foremost, our hope is set in Jesus Christ and what He is able to do - heal completely and to the uttermost. How He does this miracle is up to Him. Our work is simply to believe. Our heart remains steadfast that we would rather Jesus Himself restore Zac's heart than him having to go through multiple surgeries. Even now the doctors have no certainties on what can be done, BUT OUR JESUS DOES!!! That is a great comfort to us when we contemplate all we have been told by doctors.

When we pray, think about and talk about or to Zac, we celebrate the life of God in him and the beautiful destiny he already has in Christ. There has been much joy in between the tears that have flowed as we have walked this weighty road. We are in no way ignorant about the seriousness of Zac's heart condition, but when given the news I realized that I had only 2 choices. I could either walk seized in fear and stress for the remainder of my pregnancy, which would be such a stressful environment for my son or I could open my heart to the peace that Jesus offers all who have need. I can honestly testify that His peace has been a place of joy, comfort and strength to me. His peace has allowed me to see what is possible for those who seek Him - that there is always hope. It has allowed Brett, the girls and I to celebrate Zac and enjoy him growing as a member of our family. God's peace has been our anchor.
Are we nervous? I heard Brett answer this so well the other day. Just like any athlete who trains and prepares himself for a race, on race day he faces the nervousness of waiting to see what the outcome will be. As much as he has prepared, he will only know the full experience once in the race. This is so true of where we are at. We have done and are continuing to do all that we have heard our Father teach us on how to tackle each day. Come Zac's birth in the next few weeks, we know that He will be standing in that delivery room with us. Love Himself will be with us as we get ready for the last leg of the race.
All our love,
Brett and Janine

09 September 2011

Almost 35 Weeks!

Hello precious friends. Sorry that it's taken me some time to post an update, but I am really trying to pace myself in these last few weeks of being pregnant. This coming Monday I will be 35 weeks! 

I have to write what a miracle this is for us!!! I have mentioned before that our firstborn came prematurely at 35 weeks after being in pre-labour for 10 days. With our second born, it all started so much sooner and she was born at 33 weeks. When Brett and I decided to ask the Lord for our precious little boy, we did so in faith that it would be completely different this time and a testimony to the doctors on board (as they have all told us that this one would come even sooner). Our prayer all along has been that he would not come early and be whisked away from us into icu. Well, our little man is staying put and at our last scan this week he is steadily gaining weight and there are no signs of labour! Yay Jesus! These are all big testimonies to us at this time. 
Other precious blessings to us are the amount of people praying for Zac. We stand in awe of the army of believers that God has raised up to stand alongside us in faith for Zac's miracle heart. I cannot tell you how many messages I have received from people all over the world and in different parts of South Africa that I have never met who keep encouraging us and letting us know that they and their friends and family are all praying for Zac. I have even had precious people come up to me in shopping centre's (you know how I love visiting a shop or two - hee hee) to introduce themselves to me and let me know that they too are believing God's healing promises for our sweet boy. It absolutely infuses our hearts with love and faith as we continue to stand, believing and looking to our precious Jesus. 
I must admit that some days are harder than others. It's a constant guarding of your thoughts to stay in unity with what God says over what you have heard or feel. I want to say that I totally believe that there is nothing wrong with "feelings". God has given us the ability to feel as a gift. What I have learned in my life though is that to live simply guided by those feelings is a roller-coaster ride!!! Feelings are a great gauge to uncover what is locked up in our hearts. But if I have to choose how to tackle a day with all that we are believing for ... my feelings would never bring me peace of mind or stability. I will FOREVER be thankful for the revelation of God's Word and Person that has become my anchor. His love takes my breath away! He stands so close to us. It has literally kept my heart secure and steadfast in peace from the day we learned of the miracle Zac was in need of. 
This blog has always been a place of honesty for me. In that light I will let you in on some of the things that I have battled against in my journey so far. Tuesday was a really tough day for me. I just felt so flat and tired. It didn't help that I had a migraine. In my heart, since that Cape Town appointment when we heard "the news", I have carried this desire in my heart to fast for my son, but I knew that it would be totally unwise for me to do. Zac is underweight compared to other little ones this far along in the third trimester, so I need to keep eating healthily to give him every opportunity to grow in strength. After the scan on Tuesday although my heart was full of all the positives, I just felt like bawling my eyes out. I wanted it to be the scan that unveiled his complete miracle. I sat on my bed and told the Lord how I needed a little encouragement that day. Oh how faithful He is friends! That's when he reminded me again of how He is simply asking me to rest in faith and not strive. He has all the bases covered. I was visited by a friend who told me she wanted to bring me a meal and pray for us and Zac. She had been fasting all day for me! Do you know how much this consoled my heart!!!! The one thing I had wanted to do but could not, God had raised up another to do on my behalf never knowing the cry of my heart. I woke up on Wednesday morning to another faithful friend who felt released to tell me that since hearing the news in C.T. God had directed her to fast for Zac on certain days. She has been doing this all along since the day my heart cried out to God and she never knew my heart's cry. Oh Jesus. How faithful He is!!!
I know my posts are long these days and all about our journey with Zac, but in this season of our lives all I want to do is testify to how real and powerful God is. It has been the hardest, yet richest time in our lives as Jesus has revealed so much of Himself to us. Our faith is resolute as we look to Him and wait. 4 more weeks today until the scheduled c-section. As you have been following this blog, my greatest heart cry is for you to see Jesus for the God of Love that He is. All I have encountered in the darkest place of our lives is His Light, Love and Peace. He is close to the brokenhearted. May your heart be touched by His Presence as you seek Him out. No matter how dark your day is ... He brings Light and clarity and with that comes peace beyond any rational understanding. He loves us with a relentless love!!!
All my love,