Hello precious friends. Sorry that it's taken me some time to post an update, but I am really trying to pace myself in these last few weeks of being pregnant. This coming Monday I will be 35 weeks!
I have to write what a miracle this is for us!!! I have mentioned before that our firstborn came prematurely at 35 weeks after being in pre-labour for 10 days. With our second born, it all started so much sooner and she was born at 33 weeks. When Brett and I decided to ask the Lord for our precious little boy, we did so in faith that it would be completely different this time and a testimony to the doctors on board (as they have all told us that this one would come even sooner). Our prayer all along has been that he would not come early and be whisked away from us into icu. Well, our little man is staying put and at our last scan this week he is steadily gaining weight and there are no signs of labour! Yay Jesus! These are all big testimonies to us at this time.
Other precious blessings to us are the amount of people praying for Zac. We stand in awe of the army of believers that God has raised up to stand alongside us in faith for Zac's miracle heart. I cannot tell you how many messages I have received from people all over the world and in different parts of South Africa that I have never met who keep encouraging us and letting us know that they and their friends and family are all praying for Zac. I have even had precious people come up to me in shopping centre's (you know how I love visiting a shop or two - hee hee) to introduce themselves to me and let me know that they too are believing God's healing promises for our sweet boy. It absolutely infuses our hearts with love and faith as we continue to stand, believing and looking to our precious Jesus.
I must admit that some days are harder than others. It's a constant guarding of your thoughts to stay in unity with what God says over what you have heard or feel. I want to say that I totally believe that there is nothing wrong with "feelings". God has given us the ability to feel as a gift. What I have learned in my life though is that to live simply guided by those feelings is a roller-coaster ride!!! Feelings are a great gauge to uncover what is locked up in our hearts. But if I have to choose how to tackle a day with all that we are believing for ... my feelings would never bring me peace of mind or stability. I will FOREVER be thankful for the revelation of God's Word and Person that has become my anchor. His love takes my breath away! He stands so close to us. It has literally kept my heart secure and steadfast in peace from the day we learned of the miracle Zac was in need of.
This blog has always been a place of honesty for me. In that light I will let you in on some of the things that I have battled against in my journey so far. Tuesday was a really tough day for me. I just felt so flat and tired. It didn't help that I had a migraine. In my heart, since that Cape Town appointment when we heard "the news", I have carried this desire in my heart to fast for my son, but I knew that it would be totally unwise for me to do. Zac is underweight compared to other little ones this far along in the third trimester, so I need to keep eating healthily to give him every opportunity to grow in strength. After the scan on Tuesday although my heart was full of all the positives, I just felt like bawling my eyes out. I wanted it to be the scan that unveiled his complete miracle. I sat on my bed and told the Lord how I needed a little encouragement that day. Oh how faithful He is friends! That's when he reminded me again of how He is simply asking me to rest in faith and not strive. He has all the bases covered. I was visited by a friend who told me she wanted to bring me a meal and pray for us and Zac. She had been fasting all day for me! Do you know how much this consoled my heart!!!! The one thing I had wanted to do but could not, God had raised up another to do on my behalf never knowing the cry of my heart. I woke up on Wednesday morning to another faithful friend who felt released to tell me that since hearing the news in C.T. God had directed her to fast for Zac on certain days. She has been doing this all along since the day my heart cried out to God and she never knew my heart's cry. Oh Jesus. How faithful He is!!!
I know my posts are long these days and all about our journey with Zac, but in this season of our lives all I want to do is testify to how real and powerful God is. It has been the hardest, yet richest time in our lives as Jesus has revealed so much of Himself to us. Our faith is resolute as we look to Him and wait. 4 more weeks today until the scheduled c-section. As you have been following this blog, my greatest heart cry is for you to see Jesus for the God of Love that He is. All I have encountered in the darkest place of our lives is His Light, Love and Peace. He is close to the brokenhearted. May your heart be touched by His Presence as you seek Him out. No matter how dark your day is ... He brings Light and clarity and with that comes peace beyond any rational understanding. He loves us with a relentless love!!!
All my love,