Just moments before we had all been snuggled under blankets in the tv room watching some catch up shows when one of us glanced out the window to find this huge big beautiful rainbow silently standing front and centre in our garden. We had been completely oblivious to its beauty, all wrapped up in our show. Unfortunately my photo doesn't do it enough justice in capturing just how bright this rainbow was, or the fact that there were 2 other rainbows faintly behind it. It was breathtaking! It was beautiful enough to make us hit the pause button on the telly and run outside into the cold and wind to get a better look. Honestly, each one of us commented that it had to be the brightest rainbow we had ever seen. After we took the pic, the cold won out and we raced back inside to our comfy blankets and carried on watching where we left off. 5 minutes later I looked out the window and there wasn't a trace of it anymore.
That thought has stayed with me since. I kept thinking that we could have completely lost the beauty of that moment if we hadn't looked up, or if we had just stayed in our comfortable cozy spots on the couches. There was a moment where we almost didn't hit that pause button thinking we could get a better look after our show. I keep wondering how often we miss the beauty of a moment because we are either too wrapped up in our complacency, comfort or too overwhelmed by the storm raging around us. Just like that windy and rainy afternoon, often times when the storms rage around us, we stay where we feel safest, sometimes hiding from what we don't want to face, but we remain oblivious to the gifts that sometimes shine through the storms. Seeing that rainbow reminded me to be careful of complacency and to live watchful for the moments that God can shine through, just like that bright beautiful rainbow on a stormy day.
On this blog we do raw and real. So personally, this all took me back in thought to some of our our hardest moments almost 9 years ago when we first heard about our unborn child's heart defect and the road we walked with our 2 little girls at the time through that stormy season of not knowing how it would all turn out. Just before Zac's birth, in fact the day before we traveled to Cape Town to wait for his arrival I remember it being such a dark, grey rainy day. But as I looked up, the light broke through for a moment to reveal an exquisite rainbow and in that moment God spoke peace and hope to my heart that if it wasn't for those storm clouds, we wouldn't see the beauty of the rainbows that follow. That has always stayed with me. It's crazy how there can be beauty in a storm. That's not too say that we should be naive about the pain and danger that many storms bring with it, but my point is that we don't get to live life without having to go through the storms, but if we choose to allow God into those storms with us, He comes with His light and glory to reveal the way through and offer us the protection that we need to come through with a protected, 'un-bittered' heart. (Not a dictionary word I know, but the best way I can describe it).
When I allow myself to look back 9 years ago and remember the storms of that season and the journey through grief that followed, my truth has become that even through that immense pain (which I would never want to relive), God has always shone through the darkest moments with incredible moments of promise, kindness, hope or compassion ... just like those rainbows that chase after the storm. As unbearable as certain moments were, His Presence to comfort, breathe hope, soothe and restore have been just as vivid as the storm itself. That's why when I see a rainbow like we did the other day, I can declare with all my heart that I would rather have weathered that storm, than to have missed the radiance of learning how close God stands to the brokenhearted. Obviously we still wish with all our hearts that we were raising our little boy this side of Heaven, but I'm so grateful that we didn't choose to become defined by the pain and anguish of our loss, but are continuing to allow God to teach us how to live in a way that honors the life of that sweet boy who points us to the reality of Heaven like a beacon of hope. Zac taught me to see the beauty in a storm and just how brightly Jesus shines no matter how dark it may seem.
If you are facing an overwhelming storm today, I want speak hope into your heart. There is no storm wild enough that God won't walk into to restore your peace or your brokenness. Our Almighty God knows how to deal with the worst storms! The same way Jesus taught Peter to walk on the stormy waters with him and caught him when he became overwhelmed and started sinking (Matthew 14:22-33) ... the same way Jesus taught his disciples not to fear any storm by sleeping through the worst storm until his disciples woke him crying for help (Mark 4:35-41) is just as committed to calming the storm you find yourself facing by opening your eyes to the gift of His constant presence to weather it together with you. He won't allow you to become overcome and will always catch you when you feel like you are sinking. He will bring the rainbow to remind you that you don't ever have to feel alone because HE IS RIGHT THERE to bring you through whole, no matter how shattered you feel. He is the master of rebuilding broken hearts and brings beauty out of the ashes by bringing purpose and peace back into our live. Take heart and glimpse your rainbow of hope today.
Here's to chasing rainbows ...
🌈
Janine
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