Love in Action Journey

I have always loved that worship song "Open the eyes of my heart Lord". I was just thinking today, what would change in our lives if our prayer each day became "Open my eyes to see from a Heavenly perspective." or "Cause my ears to hear Your whispers, God.". These last 5 months have taught me to pray more prayers like that. I have realised how dull my earthly sight and hearing can be. We see through such a limited, earth bound perspective most of the time and yet, He is so gracious to keep extending grace and wisdom to learn life from His Kingdom perspective. That perspective, I'm convinced, is an everyday "love in action" perspective. A walk that I am still learning every day.   This week may we have eyes to see through love and ears that tune in to hear the precious messages of hope and encouragement that He would love us to pass on to those hurting all around us. I love that He chooses to be in partnership with us to demonstrate His hea...

Working through grief often brings up strange little triggers for me. One of the concepts that I wrestle a lot with when writing or telling my story is the phrase "I lost my child". It's a phrase that we say instead of having to say "my child died". Every time I write that phrase though, I feel a restlessness about it, because the truth is, Zac is not "lost" to me. I totally accept and understand where this phrase comes from and all my life I have used it ... but now that I have a little boy who is a Heavenly citizen, I just feel uncomfortable referring to him as lost .  My journey with Zac has given me the opportunity to meet other parents who have encountered the same path of grief that we are walking. While everybody's story is different, there is a precious bond that links us when we share common ground. It continues to deeply impact my life to hear other people's stories who have also negotiated the grief walk. Earlier this week I got ...

Lately I've had a lot of time to think. Hubby and I are repainting some walls in our lounge and dinning room. As I tackle the high walls I find myself caught up in so many of last years memories. Thoughts. Memories. They come through in waves and cause me to re-live those moments over and over again. I'll be driving and all of a sudden one of my conversations with God will re-play through my mind. I will remember the exact conversation with Him on that same road, whilst driving and feeling Zac move inside my womb. I will remember the prayers and the incredible hope that held my heart in perfect peace. I also remember desperately crying out to God and the strong assurance of His presence. Other times it will be a song. It will take me back to a moment on my knees before Him, pleading for a miracle. Sometimes the memories will bring a smile. Most times it fills my eyes with tears. I cannot believe that I even have any tears left, yet they continue to well. I've come to learn...

This gal's just turned another year older! (Don't you DARE count any wrinkles ;0) hee hee. They are just my laughter lines.) What a precious day it has been. I have been swamped in love!!! From family to friends, the love just keeps washing over me.  I stand amazed at the many ways God continues to work at loving my heart back to wholeness. I so badly wanted to hide from my birthday this year. I kind of saw it as a big reminder to everything I walked through last year. This time last year I was glowing in the news of just finding out that I was pregnant. I wanted everyone to share our joy! It was such a happy time for me. Leading up to this birthday I simply felt barren . I didn't want to face the reminder of such deep loss. BUT THEN my faithful Jesus lovingly changed my perspective. He brought my birthday one day earlier. I never saw it coming. Let me explain :) Yesterday I started getting phone calls from treasured friends singing happy birthday to me! I was then ...

I just popped over to my friend Adeye's blog. Oh my word!!! My heart is in a million pieces looking at these precious little faces totally in desperate need and with so little hope. PLEASE read her post and pray that God will move on people's hearts to give these desperate little ones a forever home. These are desperate children and God has called us to pray and reach out in whatever ways we can. If you blog or facebook, please link her post to try get as many people to see these little ones in desperate need of hope and love. It can only increase their chances of being seen. Jesus break our heart for the things that break Yours.  Much love xxx Janine 

My little bear had such a wonderful day yesterday. From morning to night it was filled with so much love. Thank you so much to all who sent her birthday messages and for every special phone call. It meant so much to her! I read her all the facebook messages yesterday. Her smile was priceless! So here was her day in pictures:  Waking up to balloons and singing. (How beautiful are those blue eyes!) Birthday kiss from the only "boy" who is allowed to kiss her for a looooooong time ;0) Surprise!!! Taking in all the stash waiting to be ripped into. Reading Lala's special card from America. (Thank you precious mom for waiting up till midnight so you could phone her first thing in the morning our side. You are always "present" in our hearts for each occasion! How we love you!!!) Taking in her sisters master piece card. So sweet! A beautiful charm bracelet from her precious Aunty Niqui, Uncle Ian and couzies. You guys always show up with so much...

My precious "Little Bear" is beautifully growing up before our eyes. 11 years old today. I can scarcely believe at how quickly the time has flown. Just the other day we were buying our precious firstborn her first bicycle.  Fast forward a few more years and now even I can ride her new bicycle! Happy birthday my precious darling. You are just as beautiful inside as you are on the outside. You have such a compassionate heart that always looks out for others. Mommy and Daddy could not be prouder to have the privilege of raising you as our firstborn. You have shaped me in more ways than I ever imagined. My life is richer for all the lessons you have taught me. Watching you grow is a treasure from my King and I count it a great honor to be called "mommy" from your sweet little lips. We could never give you enough gifts to equal the precious gifts you have given to us as your parents and family. May you continue to blossom into the fullness of all the beauty that...

A precious friend sent me this message written by Max Lucado. It speaks so deeply to my heart.  The Sufferings of His Broken Heart by Max Lucado "Go with me for a moment to witness what was perhaps the foggiest night in history. The scene is very simple; you'll recognize it quickly. A grove of twisted olive trees. Ground cluttered with large rocks. A low stone fence. A dark, dark night. Now, look into the picture. Look closely through the shadowy foliage. See that person? See that solitary figure? What's he doing? Flat on the ground. Face stained with dirt and tears. Fists pounding the hard earth. Eyes wide with a stupor of fear. Hair matted with salty sweat. Is that blood on his forehead? That's Jesus. Jesus in the Garden of Gethsemane. Maybe you've seen the classic portrait of Christ in the garden. Kneeling beside a big rock. Snow-white robe. Hands peacefully folded in prayer. A look of serenity on his face. Halo over his head. A spotlight from heaven il...

I am moody, sad, emotional, teary, mad and 101 different grief filled emotions and yet still I feel His arms enfold me. That is what you call a faithful Saviour. He takes me as He finds me and draws me near. His voice is tender and soothing. He loves away at the ache and He fills me with fresh hope. Only Jesus. Forever grateful Lord ... forever grateful.  Janine xxx